The Return of 'The Worst of Craigslist'

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Why look here Dear Readers!  Rubenesque Brunette has been lovingly wading through the fetid fecal matter of Craigslist to find you the hilarious posts that you won't see in the 'Best of Craigslist' section.  Without further ado, here are some recent posts that caught my eye:

Shower service req'd tomorrow - m4mw - 50 (Queens Quay West)

A tall, fit, professional alpha male seeks a shower slave to wash me from the waist down, front and back, drink my pee, tongue check my ass for total
cleanliness as far as your tongue can reach, suck, swallow and leave. 

Obviously you have to be submissive, ideally female. No recip or socialising

OBVIOUSLY you have to be submissive...  Also - while You're in the shower, why not get her to wash all of You?  Only from the waist down?  Will You take care of from the waist up, or is that a separate ad?  Do you really imagine that she's going to want to sit around and socialize before/after?  Though really, it would be only polite to offer her a drink after she's downed Your piss and tongued Your ass "as far as [her] tongue can reach"

seeking a foot friend - m4w - 40 (north york)

single male, handsome, outgoing, smart, seeks a non smoking  girl 23+ to be a foot friend, free salon pedicures, shoe shopping, foot massages. also good friendship talks and outings.  only interested in those who can talk and meet soon.  no fakes, phonies, frauds, time wasting.

Seeking Foot Friend - w4m (Rexdale) 26yr
***Originally posted in W4M but was flagged for some reason... I really feel
it belongs in that category though***

I really enjoy having my feet worshipped and am looking for a foot friend to worship them on a regular basis.

You must have a car, be able to host, and be in your 20's or 30's.

Ideally, you would be a little submissive and like doing things for me like driving me around when I need to go somewhere, take me for pedicures (or if
you know how to give them - give me pedicures), perhaps even buy me shoes on occasion or give me gifts/tribute.

I would like a friend too though... someone I can go for coffee with, or watch a movie with.

If you are interested, reply with a picture.

me: pretty petite brunette, cute size 7 feet, white, easygoing, 420 friendly.

These two are a match made in heaven!  Both ads were posted on the same day, within hours of each other... nothing suspicious there, right? It's obviously just karma trying to bring two like minded people together.  Though really, this is a lesson that you should always check before posting, because your match may already have an ad up.